God's Amazing Children

Day by day goes by and each day it gets a little easier to deal with the pain in my life. I realize and see God's hand in it all but sometimes it becomes an overwhelming thing and I just can't seem to convince myself that it is alright even though deep down I know that it was truly all for the best.
But I do not want to dwell on this sorry subject, I want to tell you about God's amazing children. This last Wednesday, one of my big brothers took me to lunch. I was feeling sorry for myself and throwing a pity party and he could sense that something was wrong and so he wanted to take me out to lunch. We went to Chang's Mongolian Grill and ate a lot of food. Anyway, we were sitting there and talking about what was going on in my life and some of the things that have been bothering me and there was little older couple that sat behind us. It was weird, I began to hear these "alien" sounds and giggled to brother about it. Well not long after that I was shocked to find that the man that was in the booth behind us had one of those voice box thingies. He was the one who was making the noises. I was so embarrassed and I felt really bad. We went about eating our lunch and the man came over to our table. He was showing us a picture of his grandson posing like a superhero and then man was telling us how he was going to be the next superhero. This man was amazing. He was so nice, outgoing, and he kept saying thank you. He was telling us how fast "they" grow up, meaning his grandson, "He looks all grown up and he's still just a little boy." I was blown away by the kindness this man showed by involving two total strangers in his day. The man told the waitress not to let brother eat more than he did. It was like we were old friends or something. It was really amazing. I was so warm and filled with ease and comfort. Then as the couple went to get another plate I began to feel convicted. And I saw God working in me right then, I saw myself, a young woman who was suffering from a broken heart and would not let anyone forget, I was throwing myself the biggest pity party ever and then you have this man that has obviously suffered so much pain throughout his life and he was so very thankful and just absolutely Christ-like. I knew that this man had Jesus, I just knew. I told brother that God was so huge and that it was so awesome how he places people in our lives and those people would never know how much that they actually touched lives. He and his wife got up to leave and he told us to have a great day and a wonderful Thanksgiving and he said thank you again! I was so excited to have met this man. And you know what? It doesn't even end there! We stayed a little longer than they did and on the way out the waitress told us to have a good night and that we had been taken care of. I stopped and it all just clicked, the man and his wife had paid for us. On the verge of tears I told brother that he had to find them, I wanted to hug them! I wanted that man to know how much he had touched my life that day and how much his kindness and thankfulness through his own pain made me stop and realize that I was being so selfish and ungrateful. Not that my pain was pointless or blown out of proportion necessarily but that I was selfish and not looking at the pain as growth and that I was just not in the right mind set. So this man and woman blessed me and there will be treasures in heaven awaiting them.
God does so many wonderful things. This thought that I am about to tell you is a thought that has been filtering through my mind for a couple days. This is truth. I was listening to the radio and a song came on that I had never heard. Right before the song came on I had sorta talked myself into a deal that if the song was a certain song it would mean something and if it was something else it would mean something else and I just had myself all prepared for God to show me something. He did. But what he showed me was not what I was looking for and I am so thankful. A song came on and the lyrics talked about how all He wants to do is be with us, all He wants is to be near us. A thought flashed through my head, "There is a guy out there that will want to be close to me and near to me one day, " But what I didn't realize was that the song is about Jesus. God wants to be close to us, wants to be near us, feel all that we are going through. And then I just began analyzing, something I do best, and it hit me. So often do I just want a man to feel that way about me, someone that God brings me to just feel that way about me and for me to feel that way about him, and I want that all now you know. But what I so often overlook is that I have a man in my life that feels that way about me. GOD! He wants to be near me and appreciate me and love me and care for and protect me. And how often do I shut him down by not returning that love? That when I feel like I have been rejected and all I wanted to do was love on someone I am being selfish and forgetting the only one who could ever satisfy me, the only one who will NEVER, EVER, leave me. And that he feels this way for us all of the time, he longs to be near us and to hold us close.
Abba Father I love you. Your love is so amazing. I just thank you for never giving up on me.