The kids did sleep really well last night. It was so great. Tonight I anticipate having the same results. Boston is still awake but I was a little more relaxed tonight when he wanted to hang out with Uncle Nay Nay longer. He loves to hang out with my brother, they watch cartoons, and Nathan is always making him laugh.
Tonight was a really hard night for Dustin and I. I know I can be so confrontational, also irrational. This makes for a lot of arguments. Dustin can be really passive and I am not at all. The thing about relationships is, if you are too scared to speak your mind or share an opinion, even if it conflicts with the other person's, then what is the point. There are the relationships that are just surface relationships and these tend to be fair weather relationships, fake. Then there are the relationships where they are hard, and there is conflict, and these are the most rewarding relationships. These are the relationships that are worth investing time in. My biggest issue with people is that they tip toe around things, I'd rather you just told me flat out. If our relationship is the kind that we are both willing to invest then all of the conflict will only make it stronger. Dustin and my relationship is one that we have both invested a lot in. I am very confrontational and Dustin is learning to be. He is starting to realize that conflict may not be fun but that the resolving the conflict provides opportunity for a relationship to grow. Dustin is scared that if he disagrees or confronts someone about something they are doing or saying will make that person think ill of him, not like him anymore. This is crazy I think! If people are that way with you then it wasn't much of a relationship to begin with.
God is so good. We are all sinners. If we were all perfect we wouldn't need Jesus. But because we are not perfect we have to have a relationship with Jesus. This relationship, in my case, is no where near perfect, on my end. But Jesus forgives me, he forgives me! And all of the times I have messed up there is no doubt that God isn't sad that I have sinned, but it doesn't change how he feels about me. He loves me the same as he did before I sinned. If we try to keep Jesus the center of our relationships, and we're not always going to do this, but we will be better able to resolve conflict and strengthen our relationships. I understand we shouldn't seek conflict and do our darndest to start fights but we cannot be scared of it. We have to surround ourselves with those real relationships that may be hard, harder than the fake ones, but they are much more rewarding and worth that invested time.
Now that I have vented a bit, I am off to bed. My little brother Nathan just rocked Boston to sleep. It was the cutest thing. Goodnight all!
2 comments:
there's a song by relient k and it says, "why don't you just come right out and say it? Even if the words are probably gonna hurt, I'd rather have the truth than something insencere." I feel that way about relationships too and I like to surround myself with people that are comfortable with who they are. In marraige I have had to learn to have some grace and Daniel has had to learn to confront. We are all works in progress. People shouldn't live out of fear but there are some that are careful with what they say because they actually care about other's feelings. I want to be more like those people.
Agreed. I do care about others feelings, I don't understand the people who are mean to people for no reason. I am really working on not being irrational in my confrontations. To look at both sides and approach things more level headed and non-judgmental. With my family, we are all so confrontational that that's all I knew growing up. But I couldn't be that way with friends as I grew up. Now I don't want to be in a bunch of relationships that are fake, but I also don't want the other extreme. I'd like somewhere in the middle also. You have to know when to be confrontational in a situation, that is what I am able to show Dustin. And you have to learn when to be more passive and let things go, which is what Dustin s teaching me. And I always believe in grace and working things out. The reason why people make big deals out of things should always be because they care, genuinely care. If they are just doing it for the fun of it then that relationship isn't healthy either. My main thing is we can strengthen those meaningful relationships when we have opportunity to speak into each other's lives and extend forgiveness and be forgiven. Sorry, I thought about it a lot last night and I am glad you commented. :0)
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